Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Wal-Mart

So the big news the other day was that Wal-Mart wants to change their image from a hillbilly department store to a different kind of hillbilly department store. Here is what their genius decided:

The would get rid of the blue smocks that their hillbilly employees wear. Keep in mind... emblazoned on the back of said smocks it screams HOW MAY I HELP YOU?

Wal-Mart executives don't think shoppers know how to identify Wal-Mart employees so now they're gonna be dress in tan pants with blue polo shirts. You know, like non hillbillies.

Have you ever seen a shopper wearing a blue smock with the words HOW MAY I HELP YOU? on the back? And big giant buttons adorned on the front with some lame ass saying?

And the best part of the whole 'get rid of blue smocks' thing is that Wal-Mart is going to recycle said smocks into blankets for our troops. I'm not making this up. Some of our blown up bleeeding troops are gonna be wrapped up in blue sweatstained hillbilly blankets. That should be comforting.

God Bless America.

9 comments:

Openwide said...

AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Anonymous said...

1) They're not so much smocks as they are hillbilly slipcovers.
2) I'd use 'em for tents, rather than blankets.
3) Are they changing the "wiggle dance" to something more classy?
4) If you work at Walmart, the training films instruct you to swoon if you are robbed.
5) Don't ask me how I know.
6) I leave now to iron my slipcover.

Myrna Loy

Anonymous said...

If you don't support Wal-Mart, then our troops have won.

What?

And...

Myrna Loy? Love it.

-- Lamont Cranston

cake said...

I'm *so glad* we don't have Walmart in Canada...

chinese guy/astro/scooby-doo said...

Ruts wrong writh wrall-mart?

cake said...

Dear chinese guy/astro/scooby-doo:

Evelything.

Anonymous said...

where does iano work again? he seems very familiar with walmart.

Clinky said...

l-l-l-l
l-l-l-l-l
l-l-l-l-l-l
l-l-l-l-l-l-l
l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l
l-l-l-l-l-l-l
l-l-l-l-l-l
l-l-l-l-l
l-l-l-l

crispy hexagon

cake said...

Look at that...Clinky was up all night doing hexagons. ::sigh::