Thursday, August 09, 2007

Hope.

In the news this week is the story of some miners trapped, possibly dead, in a mine somewhere in Utah.

After a day or two of praying, a group of people (probably women) showed up and spelled out the word HOPE using votive candles.

A couple of things:

1. They are stupid....the spelling out of words with candles usually does no good.

2. They will probably somehow be responsible for some votive miners in some other part of the world getting trapped in a votive mine while trying to replenish the ever diminishing votive supply.

It's kinda like the Butterfly Effect....everytime a votive candle flickers in Utah a miner in Finland dies.

Or something.

23 comments:

Sparkle Plenty said...

...spelling out of words with candles usually does no good... When does the spelling out of words do good? (Congrats--the handbasket was just upgraded to an express train. You get to blow the whistle!)

bacon ace said...

"When does the spelling out of words do good?"

In early childhood education I suppose. I'm sure bemis could enlighten us if she wasn't being held in a dungeon somewhere.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

And don't forget football games....bunch of shirtless guys spelling out GO PATS in red paint on their chests usually helps team to victory.

Or something.

(it would be WAY cooler if they spelled out GO PATS with buring candles on their bare chests.)

Lois Lane said...

salkjfsdarj wri u8akBs dlkjawsidsk akdi doiek doadlfkps dkeowkl akdjke0 dkaoi dklak!! dklsl;s?

asfdksdkjfSSP!

You're right. This spelling thing is completely unnecessary. To hell with it. Will make editing copy at work a whole lot easier too.

Cake said...

What!? Spelling's been just made obsolete?

Ya-hew! Thatz grate nuze!

What? Just with candles? Oh, never mind then.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

LOIS! I'm blushing! Dgtef!!

Lois Lane said...

IANO: ekpolq!

Cake said...

Lois, I'm shocked, just shocked! And here I thought you were a good gal.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Oh, she's good...real hbefdtmns good!

Sparkle Plenty said...

Lois: You potty mouth! Here's some Lifebuoy, young lady.

Mr. Bacon Ace: My dear, innocent Mr. Bacon Ace. Let the moppets frolic and run amok--don't edu-ma-cate them. The spelling out of words never does any good. The "misspelling out of words"--THAT makes me money. Originally, the mining folks had "HOP." I made a cool mil adding the candle-composed "E." KA-CHING!

Sparkle Plenty said...

Whoa, mister. You're beyond Lifebuoy now.

Lois Lane said...

Sparkle: Thanks! What wine goes with this? A good Merloofah?

Sparkle Plenty said...

Uh...um...Bathgundy? Naw. Stick with the Merloofah...

Cake said...

Does "infrastructure" count as "infrastructure" if I spell it, say, "inphrastrukture"?

bacon ace said...

Only if you're a hip hop artist.

Anonymous said...

Did the women wear special candle lighting gowns? Oh ok, that is now an old joke.
I laughed too much at the 'dig here' comment. They could just face facts and light out the letters RIP instead maybe. At least it would be a nice suprise if anyone came out alive.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Is everyone else just as impressed as I am at how evil Bella/Jayne is?

bacon ace said...

I didn't know she had it in her, and I'm impressed. However I do know that the handbasket will have her in it.

Lois Lane said...

Let's face facts. A handbasket is way too small.

Do they make handmotorhomes?

Sparkle Plenty said...

Impressed, but not shocked. Her blog makes the depth and creativity of her potential evil apparent...Plus, she's got a secret weapon--in a British accent, anything evil sounds ultra-civilized...Rend the air with more classy evil, Bella/Jayne! :-)

bacon ace said...

Well now that I know she's evil I have to start reading her blog.

Cake said...

To continue coming around here, you just know Jayne must be a confirmed member of the murderer's row of bastards and villains (or whatever that line was from a few weeks back).

Hurrah, IANO's evil influence has officially spread to TWO countries!

Sparkle Plenty said...

I continue to love that line of Mr. Bostongraf's! And, I still see it as the first line of a pulp novel with a gal with a gun on the front. "In this murderer's row of bastards and villains, where hope ain't lost so much as it's moved on and ain't left a forwarding address..."