Thursday, August 30, 2007

That US Senator that was in the news this week

I think he was from Idaho or Utah or one of those other un-important states.

To sum up his story:

He was sitting in a stall in a public bathroom and tapped his foot against the guy in the stall next to him as a way to 'flirt' or something. Some kinda signal for sex. It was a cop, he got arrested, pleaded guilty, and is now claiming he did nothing wrong blah blah blah. (If you need more info read up on it.)

The point of today's blog is not if he is or isn't gay. Or his morals. Or his party affliation. Blah Blah Blah..

The point is when the heck did a filth encrusted public toilet become a sexy spot? Never EVER in my life have I ever thought to pick up chicks in a public bathroom. It's very limited. It's dirty. It's noisy.

Though I suppose if I looked down and saw a size 6 red stilletto heel under the stall next to me I might be tempted to tap it with my foot. Or something.

And then I'd ask The Hoag where he got the size 6 red stilletto heels.

18 comments:

bacon ace said...

We were just talking about this at work. Gay or not no man wants to be disturbed while "moving some units".

bacon ace said...

On second thought if it was Christopher Walken...

Sparkle Plenty said...

1) His party affiliation isn't important 'cause he's Republican, right?
2) Maybe he was tapping his foot to a really good song ("Taking Care of Business"?) on his Ipod as he moved some units?
3) I dunno, men's rooms are pretty sexy to us chicks due to the long lines for ladies rooms. It's a surgical strike for you boys--in, out, whisk, whisk...We're still standing there singing rounds and tatting tablecloths.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Why do women take so long in the bathroom? Do they just drink way more thus the need for longer pee times?

Or is the time consumed with wrapping up the seat like it was Tutankammin or something?

cake said...

The version of the story that I saw on the Canadian news this morning had him peeking through the crack between the two stalls and making "suggestive gestures."

I think I like our version better.

cake said...

"Why do women take so long in the bathroom?"

Well, there's all those complex handshakes and secret codes we have to exchange when we pass each other in the bathroom...really slows us down, ya know. Being a woman is worse than being a Freemason sometimes.

(Oh, and also, we're talking about David Tennant.)

Sparkle Plenty said...

The Cake makes some excellent points. However, I believe that our bathroom visits take longer due to the basic differences in male vs. female infrastructure. Plus, there is always a lot of bathroom wall poetry to mull over.

Lois Lane said...

Yes, and don't forget that while we're in there we have to braid each other's hair and paint our nails...

Oh wait. That's Buddy Night. Never mind.

cake said...

I just had a thought (yes, a thought)...if IANO is checkin' out Hoagy's footwear in the next stall, that means they go to the bathroom in pairs.

You know, like *women* often do.

Hmmm.

utah said...

Hey! We're important, we have MORMONS!

Mitt R. said...

I heart Utah.

confused easterner said...

Utah has MORONS??

A Dirty Hoe said...

What's wrong with Idaho?

Great Salt Lake said...

I'm available in a low-sodium version, too!

Mitt Romney said...

I have 15 wives! The hot campaignin' wife, the cookin' wife, the cleanin' wife, the nursin' wife, the channel changin' wife, uh...dopey, bashful, sleepy, doc, stinkin' pete the pirate wife, four back-up wives, and the "stunt wife"

smart talkin' broad said...

I da hoe!? No WAY, bitch! YOU da hoe!

bella said...

If it's good enough for George Michael...

Sparkle Plenty said...

Good point, Bella...