Thursday, August 02, 2007

"Where is that confounded bridge?"

Some of my random thoughts on the bridge collapse in Minnesota.

1. Reporters are stupid. I actually heard them say the follwing:

"There will be some deaths and fatalities."

"The bridge collapsed one hour ago...two hours ago in Minnesota, as they are on Central Time."

2. It must be really important because Matt Lauer from the Today Show is there wearing blue jeans, an unbuttoned collar, and he has a five o'clock shadow.

3. They claim it's not terrorism, but don't you find it odd that on the 1st year anniversary of the TWIN Towers falling, a bridge falls in the TWIN Cities? Into the Mississippi....which has three sets of TWIN letters? That ain't just a coincidence.

4. All the networks have named the collapse. Here are some of them:

a) Mayhem on The Mississippi

b) Catastrophe on the River

c) Tragedy in the Twin Cities

d) Bridge on the River Cry (I just made that one up)
------------------------------------------------------------

5. In the next week you will hear the word 'infrastructure' more than you'll hear the word 'the'...in fact, we should play a drinking game. Everytime you hear the word 'infrastructure' have a drink....

6) I'm already sick of the bald, blood splattered guy that looks like a wrestler. I wish he had died.

9 comments:

Lois Lane said...

"I'm already sick of the bald, blood splattered guy that looks like a wrestler...."

Why so much hate for poor old Willard Scott?

I Ain't No Oprah said...

"And here is what's collapsing in YOUR neck of the woods."

cake said...

I've been playing your drinking game for 10 minutes and I'm already ::hic:: drunk. Thanks a ::hic:: lot...

Sparkle Plenty said...

In the news, infrastructure (sip) is always described with one of three words: "crumbling," "aging," or "sagging"...Maybe "crumbling infrastructure..." calls for two drinks? (sip sip)

Spanking new infrastructure said...

Tell me about it.

*sobs*

Anonymous said...

Cake:

Just infrastructure make infrastructure sure infrastructure to infrastructure hand infrastructure someone infrastructure else infrastructure the infrastructure keys infrastructure. And infrastructure the infrastructure combination infrastructure to infrastructure the infrastructure wall infrastructure safe infrastructure .

Sparkle:

Are you sure you're not reading stories about Elizabeth Taylor?

NoOprah:

"Bridge on the River Cry" is so deliciously wrong I wish to hell I'd thought of it first.

Lois:

The wonder of it all is that Willard Scott has a reservoir of love to draw from in the first place.

-- Lamont "Miles Behind But infrastructure Scrambling to Catch Up" Cranston

cake said...

::takes 17 large sips of wine::

I hope you'll all ::hic:: remember whose fault thish ish later when I'm poshting ::hic:: drunken ramblingingingings over on my own blog. Damn infra ::hic::... infrastruct... oh never mind. Pash the bottle, Lamont?

devil said...

Oh wonderful! Thanks to this blog, you now have enough Frequent Evil points that you've been upgraded to the next circle of hell. Congratulations.

SplishSplash in de nort' countree said...

Cake's heard infrastructure so many times she's about to pass out.

As a matter of fact, I think I heard her singing:
.
.
.

Like a bridge under rubbled waters
I will fall me down...