Monday, January 07, 2008

DIAL Z for Irish Spring

Probably the biggest issue of the day and nobody talks about it.

Are we afraid? Embarrassed?

Is it someone else's problem?

Should the government expose this for what it is? Should they help those that need the help?

Each year this seems to become a bigger and bigger problem. Especially in America. I'm not sure if this is as prevalent in other countries.

What am I talking about you ask?

I'm talking about soap commercials on TV.

They either show a smiling guy in the shower from the waist up washing his chest with a bar of soap in hand.

OR

They show a smiling pretty woman from the top part of her breast up, washing her arms.

So what is the problem??

The problem is clear.... the soap companies think men are doing something that makes their chests filthy that they need a scrubbin' every day and women are doing something horrible that makes their arms filthy.

Do women not get filthy chests? Are men arms always clean?

My chest has NEVER been dirty, yet each day like some Madison Avenue Drone I wash my chest. My "filthy, filthy" chest.

And you Stepford Sheep broads probably spend way too much time scrubbing your "dirty" arms.

I think it's time for a role reveral on this. Broads...start washing your stink filled chests and Dudes....wash your feces encrusted arms.

It'll make us all feel Zestfully good.

9 comments:

Sparkle Plenty said...

Yet, the answer is so pure and natural...the people on the commercials do not HAVE any other body parts--the guys only have chests, heads, and arms and the broads only have top parts of breasts, heads, and arms.

And yet, they smile and valiantly lather up their partial bodies.

It is a lesson to us all.

Thank you, soap companies.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

I'm glad you summed that up.

Sparkle Plenty said...

To sum up: $1.00 for my sum-upTM.

Lois Lane said...

I always thought by 2008 we'd have robots to do the washing up for us.

Damn lazy soap-phobic robots.

cake said...

So I'm only a bit of breast, arms, and a head!?

Where'd all these other bits come from? Get off me, get off me!

::tries to run away from legs::

AAAAH!

(To sum up: this is a very silly place.)

cake said...

Oh, wait, you meant just the broads in the commercials...not all broads.

To sum up: sometimes I read too fast.

madison avenue drone said...

I HATE CHEW!

soap company rep said...

You'll be hearing from our lawyers, Mr. IANO. Our very, very, very, very clean lawyers.

Casablanca Comics said...

If I could figure out how to do a link I would send you here.....

http://www.adrants.com/images/lynx_shower.jpg