So last night I'm watching the results of the primary voting across the Unites States when all of a sudden it hit me.
It hit me bigtime.
I was stunned. Amazed. I knew what I had to do.
It seems the United States doesn't have any states that begin with the letter B. I'm here to change that.
And not only that....but I'm gonna change who lives in those states and what goes on in those states.
Because I'm in charge. Or something.
1. Bearizona: This will be a great state...but just for bears.
2. Best Virginia: This will be the better of the two Virginias. The Best Virginia. Only the better people will be allowed to live here.
3. Barkansas: This will be a state just for dogs....seems fitting that Hillary Clinton was from here. Be warned....Barkansas will be a noisy state.
4. Blokelahoma: This is where we'll put all transplanted British folk. Toot-toot, bip-bip.
5. Bi-oming: This is where we'll put the gay folk and bi-sexuals. It'll be like San Francisco but not as cool.
6. Boregon: This will be just for the dullards.
7. Balabama-wop-boom-bam: This is where Little Richard will live. Unless he relocates to Bi-oming.
8. Boo Hampshire: This is where all the dead people will 'live'. They will not be happy.
These are just some of my early ideas. I might make all states begin with other letters that are not in use. I'm undecided.