Saturday, July 26, 2008

Trial by Gravy

The other day I gave my dog a bit of my mashed potatoes and gravy.

I put it in her dog dish.

Puppy ate said mashed potatoes.

A few days later Wifey says to me: "Damn dog, she got gravy everywhere!"

One simple act. One simple statement.

But let's examine that further, shall we? Under the guise of a trial.

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BALLIFF: "Please state your full name."

WIFEY: "Wifey D. Ogghader."

BALLIFF: "Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?"

WIFEY: "Whatever."

DASH McLAWYER: "Did you state in your sworn deposition that the "dog got gravy everywhere"

WIFEY: "Yes."

DASH: "Did the dog in fact get the gravy everywhere?"

WIFEY: "Yes."

DASH: "Did the dog get the gravy on the countertop?"

WIFEY: "No."

DASH: "Did the dog get the gravy on the toaster?"

WIFEY: "No."

DASH: "Did the dog get the gravy on the phone?"

WIFEY: "No."

DASH: "Did the dog get the gravy on the doorknob?"

WIFEY: "No."

DASH: "Did the dog get the gravy on the table?"

WIFEY: "No."

DASH: "Did the dog get the gravy on the television set?"

WIFEY: "No."

DASH: "Can you please tell this court, where in fact, the dog got the gravy!?"

WIFEY: "Everywhere."

DASH: "No further questions. The prosecution rests."

5 comments:

Lois Lane said...

To sum up:

The dog got gravy everywhere....constantly.

the beatles said...

Gravy...Here, There, Everywhere.

Stu said...

Everywhere Rigby

creepy beatles said...

I'll Follow The Sun Everywhere

Ain't She Sweet Everywhere

Drive My Car Everywhere

PS I Love You....Everywhere.

I Wanna Be Your Man Everywhere

I'm Looking Through You...Everywhere.

Let It Be Everywhere

You Really Got A Hold On Me Everywhere

Twist and Shout Everywhere

not cake at all said...

To sum up further:

When Cake is away...the mice go into hiding.

Or something.