Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Two text messages, a conversation, and a small rant about John McCain

FIRST TEXT MESSAGE WITH YOUNGEST DAUGHTER ON DAY BEFORE FIRST DAY OF COLLEGE:

ME: "I miss you already."

YOUNGEST: "Same here :)"

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SECOND TEXT MESSAGE WITH YOUNGEST ON FIRST DAY OF COLLEGE:

ME: "So how is the weed and booze?"

YOUNGEST: "Good."

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CONVERSATION WITH ME, WIFEY, AND OLDEST...THIS MORNING:

WIFEY: "There is a stupid fly in here and IF you people would put the sugar spoon away it would go away."

ME: "Oh...that's just Tony. He was here yesterday also."

OLDEST DAUGHTER: ::laughter:: "You had a different name for him yesterday."

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JOHN McCAIN: War Hero?

I think not.

Five years of getting tortured by Charlie doesn't make one a hero. It makes one a bad soldier for getting caught in the first place.

You don't get caught, you don't get tortured, you kill Charlie, you are a hero.

Or something.

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22 comments:

cake said...

"There is a stupid fly in here and IF you people would put the sugar spoon away it would go away."

So to sum up:

If it was a smaht fly, putting the sugar spoon away wouldn't make a difference.

charlie said...

You rogic makes to sense.

johnny mccain said...

There was a fly in my POW camp...it was horrible!!!

john McCain said...

Hey Noprah,
High Five! Ow Ow Ow Ow...rats...I can't lift my tortured arms that high.

the real mccoy...I mean, mccain said...

Rats are responsible for my neck, stop bringing back painful memories!

John Kerry said...

I didn't get caught. I didn't get tortured. I killed Charlie.

Does that mean you think I'm a hero?

No. You think I'm "something," right?

cousin saul said...

John Kerry,
Yeah...you're something...a pile of something!

John Kerry said...

Yeah, Cousin Saul, I figured that was exactly what "something" meant.

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Kerry didn't get tortured??

So then what happened to his face?

John Kerry said...

I wasn't tortured in 'nam...the torture began after I married Teresa.

And, of course this blog.

cake said...

"the torture began after I married Teresa.

And, of course this blog."

John Kerry married this blog!?

John kerry said...

I was for this blog, before I was against it....

John Kerry said...

It was dark. I was drunk. The blog was witty. What can I say?

(Don't tell Teresa.)

John Kerry said...

Yeah, I dig the flip-floppin'.

What politician doesn't dig the flip-floppin'?

(I have switch-flops now, also. Coolness.)

the blog said...

I wish you didn't snore.

John Kerry said...

I have, however, received congressional medals of honors for my spooning. Nevermind which congressman gave me the medal.

(You drool and steal the sheets. But, I don't mind. It's better than when you keep asking me, "Why the long face?")

the blog said...

Okayfine, you're right...the spooning is excellent.

However, if you're going to whisper in my ear, could you think of something sexier to say than, "Hey baby, wanna meet my little 'senator'?"

John Kerry said...

I thought that was a killer line.

But, you love it when I say, "Hey, baby, let's filibuster under my Beltway." Right?

Right?

the blog said...

*swoons*

Oh yeah, when you say that, you just know I'm a few seconds from conceding to your-- whoops, sorry, I forgot you don't like me to put it like that.

I mean, giving in to you.

John Kerry said...

Conceding? Conceding?

Uh-oh.

The little 'senator' just dropped out of the race and no amount of flip-flopping can bring him back.

David'Z RantZ said...

Cake: "John Kerry married this blog!?"

Just pretended married.

IANO: Your point about McCain reminds me of the line in The Magnificent Seven: "The man for us is the man who gave him those scars."

Rick Lowell said...

You asked your daughter about the weed and booze but forgot to ask her if the sex was any good. What kind of a parent are you?