Tuesday, October 28, 2008

A few rejected SNIPPETS from yesterday

ME: "Wow...you shaved off your sideburns, and so close to Halloween!"

BACON ACE: "They weren't a costume you know."

ME: "Oh."

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DAVE CLARK FIVE FAN: "Hey look...he has a puzzle of the Beatles White Album."

DOLT: "What's the puzzle of?"

DCFF: "The Beatles White Album."

DOLT: "What is the picture of?"

DCFF: "The White Album."

DOLT: "I don't get it. That's stupid."

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GAL: "Do you have V For Vendetta."

ME: "Yup, it's right here."

GAL: "Thank you." :::puts back on shelf::

ME: "Just curious why you put it right back on the shelf?"

GAL: "I was just testing you to see if you were a good shop."

ME: "Having V For Vendetta passes the test?"

GAL: "Yup."

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BASEBALL OFFICIAL: "We should cancel this game because of the weather."

BUD SELIG (Retard): "Let's wait until the game gets tied up."

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IDIOT: "I would like to apply for a liquor license."

CLERK: "What will your business be called?"

IDIOT: "Drunkenstein's."

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,444377,00.html

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7 comments:

cake said...

1) Are you sure that was Bacon Ace and not his Evil Twin Vegetarian Brother, Carrot Ace?

2) It's the White Album and not just A Snowstorm, correct? Just checking.

3) My test for a good shop is whether they have the Beatles White Album puzzle.
3a) Not really.

4) The guy's first name is "Bud"...whattya expect?

5) Best part of that story: "Perhaps the blood of the inculpable will cause a paradigm shift." Insanity crossed with bureaucratese! Perfect!

bacon ace said...

1) It was indeed me
2) That was Suynday not yesterday Mr Fibber. It makes me question everything you write.

Tex said...

I like the name of my bar if I ever own one

My Own FN Bar

genius, I know :)

I Ain't No Oprah said...

Dear Bacon (Asshole) Ace,

If you notice the TITLE of today's post it explains all.

They were REJECTED from YESTERDAY'S blog.


Nice Costume.

carrot ace said...

I think I might be smarter than my identical twin brother.

Whatever said...

http://ihateyourfashion.blogspot.com/2008/09/when-sideburns-attack.html

bacon ace said...

Then it should have read "A few rejected SNIPPETS from yesterday's blog" not "yesterday".

I'm going to need a ruling here. We have a few editors on hand don't we?